For the past few years, my friend Terri and I have written “Go bowling at Antelope Lanes” as one of our New Year’s resolutions. She is the official keeper of our resolutions from the previous years. When we get together on New Year’s Eve to make fresh ones, we unseal and read last year’s lists to each other, laughing as we check off what we’ve each accomplished and what remains to be done.
It’s not that we have anything against Antelope Lanes, which looks delightful from the outside at least. I enjoy bowling. It reminds me of childhood birthday parties in my small town, where the bowling alley was the one kid-friendly place to go until they built the roller rink and suddenly we had options. It’s just fun to write down a resolution that could be achieved with minimal effort and a couple of hours spent having fun with friends, but for us still never gets accomplished.
This is my emergency back-up resolution. If all else fails and I don’t read 10 books or drop 10 pounds or run 10 miles or whatever I come up with as goals to saddle 2024 with, I can at least hop into my car, drive a few miles to Prescott Valley and quickly cross one off the list before the year is over.
More than two centuries later I still find truth in that article. We seem to cram so much into the end of each year, running at full throttle through all the holiday gatherings and festivities. For me, December is filled with too many events, too much wine and chocolate, and not enough walks around the neighborhood with my dogs and husband. The to-do list of things to get done at work and home before the year ends seems to grow, not shrink, with each passing day. Some days I’m not as kind or as patient as I’d hope to be, as late nights and too much junk food catch up with me. When New Year’s Eve rolls around, I’m ready for the cycle of stress and indulgence to be over. Finally, it’s time to put down the sugar cookies, pack up the box of Christmas cards that weren’t all written, dig out the running shoes, and drop last year’s calendar into the fireplace.
When I wake up on New Year’s Day, I’ll get started on being the person I’d planned to be all last year. I’ll be so organized. I’ll run out and buy a new, better planner. I’ll go to the gym after work. I’ll start the Christmas cards in early October and mail them the day after Thanksgiving. I’ll shop for meaningful gifts throughout the year for friends and family, so I don’t end up giving them candles and hand lotion at the last minute. I won’t procrastinate on this column and write it the night before it’s due. I will call long-distance friends and catch up in a real, heartfelt conversation instead of sending the occasional text along with a few funny photos of our dogs. Mike and I will plan vacations, cook at home, eat healthier foods, walk more, spend less time playing on our phones, and become all-around better versions of ourselves.
But if none of this happens, it’s good to know I can always go bowling. I like the thought of making it to a ripe old age and on my deathbed, being asked if I have any regrets in life. I’ll pause for a few minutes to gather my thoughts before whispering, “Well, I did almost everything I set out to do, but somehow, I never made it to Antelope Lanes.”
Prescott-area resident Kelly Paradis is a community liaison for Good Samaritan Home Health, Hospice & Marley House. She loves listening to and writing stories about life.